As you probably know since you landed here I have a really weird name. Naturally this confuses a lot of beings so heres the looong explanation of what's up with my name.

How it all began

In the summer of 2021 younger me made a new Discord account. As younger me always did with new accounts I wanted to give it a new unique name. But not just any boring name. It had to be something special. Something meaningful. Younger me had an idea: How about I take this very sophisticated makeshift encryption I thought of (It really was makeshift and it really isn't sophisticated) and encrypt something as my username. So younger me did that. I threw something through that encryption cypher and out popped this abomination: "Ncam Gnrvngu".

The consequences

Being cyphertext it really looks like I hit my head a little too hard on the keyboard. While it might have looked cool in the begining this username does have some downsides that I discovered since I started using it more and more:

1. Nobody can pronounce it (Including me lol)
2. It regularly confuses other beings
3. Nobody can remember it

Even though this username is confusing and complicated it's still very near and dear to my heart. It's something I've lived with for a relatively long time and its cleartext is also still relevant to me (and weirdly getting more relevant).

The solutions

So as I don't want to get rid of this name anytime soon, I (and others) had to come up with some solutions

Nobody can pronounce it

This is one of the most common questions I get about this name: How the heck do I pronounce that? I genuinely had no real answer to this for a long time. But then I registered an account on schenklradio.de, a web radio station with lots of community involvment, mostly consisting of community members voting on what songs should be played next. That presented a relatively hard problem for the hosts on Schenklradio: When a song gets played, the hosts usually read out the names of the users that whished fo it. That of course gets quite complicated with a username like mine. However being a really kind and welcoming community, I was presented with a very creative solution: If you ignore the first part of my name, throw in ungodly amounts of imagination and gently stir you could see "Guru" in there. Which is great. It's short. Everybody knows how to pronounce it. Sure its kind of complicated to get from "Ncam Gnrvngu" to "Guru" but hey: It does its job.

Disclaimer: "Guru" is not supposed to mean that I claim to be a guru at anything. It simply is the best solution I have found for pronouncing my name.

It regularly confuses other beings

You're reading the solution to this problem right now! Having a blog gives me the opportunity to create this article as a reference that I can point people to in case of confusion. A comprehensive ressource covering everything from how I got here to how to use it. Being a webpage I also have the option to update this article to improve it: So if this thing needs aditional context, clarification or leaves a question unanswered: Do hit me up so I can improve it!

Nobody can remember it

This honestly is the hardest problem to solve. I don't think theres a real solution for it. I can however make life less cumbersome for everyone by making, again, this webpage. It provides a central hub from which I can link to all socials and whatnot so you just have to click a link and don't have to type in everything. Of course you also have to get here. To make that easier I will try to link to this page from as many places as possible so you can just click on it and voila: You're here.

So what does it mean?

Having already written down a lot of things I still haven't answered the most important question: But what does it mean?? Now of course I could just write it down here and call it a day. But where's the fun in that? The encryption really isn't hard to break so I present you with an offer: If you manage to decrypt whatever the heck young me encrypted in my name, I will tell you what it means. So if you manage to decrypt it, text me on Matrix, Fedi or Signal! I just have one demand: Please don't spoil the fun for other beings and tell them what it means.